• 09
  • May
    2011

Joel Dovev, writing for HuffPost Divorce, is spot-on when it comes to what he characterizes as "the 10 plagues of divorce." As Long Island family law and divorce lawyers, we certainly agree that there are certain "plagues" that should be avoided - if at all possible - during a divorce. While keeping in mind that not some unfavorable circumstances are usually inherent in every divorce, Dovev's advice is worth bearing in mind.

To paraphrase some of Dovev's advice:

  • Do not live together if you know you're headed for divorce - or after divorce. It's incredibly awkward to enter into divorce litigation when you're still living with your "opponent," and it might be even worse if you're still living together after divorce and both of you want to move on with your lives.
  • Do not do battle over your friends. Let them pick sides if they must. Your true friends will still be your friends after the divorce.
  • Choose your attorney wisely. This is the one we don't agree with - Dovev's "sleazy attorney" bit. It's true, there are bad actors in every profession and in the legal profession an unprofessional or incompetent attorney will make all other attorneys look bad. That's why it's important to choose your family law attorney carefully.
  • Stay away from social media. Posting pictures of you and your new girlfriend or boyfriend - while divorce litigation is pending - is just asking in the worst possible way for opposing counsel to use that evidence against you.
  • Don't use your child as a go-between. Child custody cases are some of the most difficult cases that a family law attorney routinely handles, simply because these cases involve what for most people are most important: their children. Don't bad-mouth your soon-to-be ex-spouse or partner to your child. Use your best judgment. Do not do anything that could jeopardize the parent-child relationship - for either of you.

Source: The 10 Plagues of Divorce